My Lunch Buddy

People call us "lunch buddies". They start to associate us with each other, especially during lunch break. Seeing me alone in the school canteen, they wonder you are not with me, and then later on realize it is your day off.

I just wonder. Have I thanked you for being my constant companion during lunch? Maybe I already did. Or maybe I just smiled to make you feel I am grateful. Nonetheless, I want you to know I am truly thankful to you for hearty reasons.

You make me feel comfortable.

You make me talk about important details of my life.

You make me feel I am not alone.

You make me smile.:)

You make me look forward. . .

Thank you, Jayp!:)

Unique Friendship

Last night was an awesome experience. Two of my roommates were drunk. They are not really drunkards but opted to drink for almost the same reasons: Badin missed her family and Babem had a petty misunderstanding with her mom. They had their drinking session at our terrace, which I was clueless of as I was busy in our room surfing the internet. They were already drunk when I got their letter asking my permission for them to drink.

I have known them both shortly since we are roommates for only more than a month now. I am more than a decade senior than them. Our age gap is something I appreciate. Their youthful aura makes me feel light and brings out the "child" in me. They remind me of my college days then.

They have different personalities. Badin is the silent type; Babem is the expressive one. But last night, I discovered something new about them. When drunk, Badin is more expressive while Babem is silent and sweet. Badin kept on laughing, talking and apologizing for drinking. Babem kept on telling us, " I love you", while kissing our cheeks. And a normal reaction of drunk ones, they did vomit.

I was just amazed with how we reacted with their behaviors. Together with our "landlady" and other house mates, we assisted them as they were too drunk to handle themselves. I could sense no irritation among my house mates. I saw everyone's care for them. We assisted them in different ways. Our landlady and two house mates brought Babem to the comfort room so she could take a shower since her clothes were dirty due to too much vomiting. One house mate brought a pale for them to vomit. Other house mate brought mugs with lukewarm water for them to drink. Everyone had the patience listening to Badin's emotional and often-repeated lines. Another roommate was busy documenting the "event". . . An hour later, we went to bed after ensuring the two had slept already.

Yes, we all came from different backgrounds. We only got to know each other the time we live in this apartment. It is like living in ABS-CBN's "Big Brother's House". The main difference though is that we behave normally, not to earn a prize. In my case, I have lived in this boarding house with the same landlords for about four years now. Yes, I also considered finding another place wherein I could have my own room and enjoy some privacy. But my previous experience renting my own room was lonesome. I felt so alone especially during troubled times. And I think what really made me stay this long here is the sense of belongingness. I feel like they are my "second family". Our landlady and her seaman husband are not just good looking but very considerate. Their pretty five-year old girl is so smart that sometimes I feel like she outwits us.

Indeed, a unique friendship. The sad part though is that I can not have the same roommates all the time. In fact, my old roommates already left after finishing college. I was depressed when they left for good since I got so used of being with them. Yet, as the time goes on, I have realized one happy part, that is, every now and then I gain not only new house mates but friends. I am also glad I still have one house mate (Ms. Amie) who has been with me for few years already. She also told me she prefers to stay here with her younger sister even after graduating.

Surely I wont stay here forever for I also want to have a family of my own in the near future. I wont be with these young ladies, my landlady and her family for a long time. But there is one thing I am sure of. They always have special place in my heart.

Thank you Lord for these wonderful people! :-)

Note: By the way, Badin and Babem are already good while I am writing this. We are all teasing them. :-)

The Only One True Love

Some close friends of mine keep on telling me to find the one for me. As they say, it is high time for me to love and be loved. I agree. It has been five years I am not in a relationship. Perhaps, they start thinking I am forgetting the need (is it really a need?) to have someone in my life. Of course not. I never forget. I just choose to wait.

I don't think I have to find him. I still believe that the one for me will come at the right time, God's perfect time. Those in my past came to my life and later on left for good reasons. Yes, I could have chosen to keep my past relationship, but for certain reasons, it slipped away from my hands, no matter how tightly I held it. It was not just meant for me. And as the time goes by, after all the tears, I have embraced acceptance, and more importantly, obedience.

Sometimes I am left wondering what really love is. I experienced loving and being loved by someone special. Yet till now, I cannot really fathom the truest meaning of love. Maybe because the ones I loved could not help but cause me pain, well, human as they are. And such pain used to break my heart. But I believe, there is such a thing as necessary pain-- the kind of pain that makes you mature, strong and hopeful of the future. The kind of future you ask from above.

A new friend recently sent me a text message that reads, "a man's love fails but God's love never fails". I am agreeable. I am always unfaithful to the Lord, yet, He remains forever faithful. God may allow some tears to flow, some misery to rest in our hearts, yet, it is just His way of pruning and molding us into better persons, pleasing to His eyes.

For me, God's love is the only one true love! He died in the cross just for us.
Ours is just an imitation.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOY0mjjmx8Y

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I Corinthians 13: 4-7,13
"Love is patient and kind; it is not jealous or conceited or proud; love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable; love does not keep a record of wrongs; love is not happy with evil, but is happy with the truth. Love never gives up and its faith, hope and patience never prevail. Meanwhile, these three remain: faith, hope and love; and the greatest of these is love.

Having a Joyful Heart

Many times, I counted my sorrows than my joys. And it made my sadness grow into doubt, resentment and worst, bitterness. I used to cling to my past. I was (and maybe still am to some extent) the type who could hardly let go of something and someone I cherished but lost. I dwelt with so many "what ifs", "why couldn't be" that I forgot to see the beautiful things ahead of me. I did cry "bucket" of tears for my failed relationships. I blamed myself with the thought that I could have chosen to be happy, with the man I used to love, and with a career I dreamed of. There was even a point in my life that I felt so stagnant and it seemed nothing better will happen. Everything was but routine. I was sick of waking up everyday and doing the same thing again and again. . .

Yet, when our church pastor mentioned in his sermon to start counting God's blessings, I was amazed to know I have many reasons to be happy, much more, joyful. God has been good to me in many ways which I failed to see.

Foremost, I thank God for this life. Not all are given the chance to see the beauty of His wonderful creation. I thank Him for the good health and strength. When I had appendectomy almost two years ago, I realized that indeed God is faithful. I celebrated my birthday in the hospital, something I never had the hint would happen. I cried hard when the doctor advised for urgent surgery, otherwise my appendix might rapture and cause harm to my life. I chose not to inform my loved ones right away. I did not want to make them worry a lot. My mother is hypertensive and my father is easily saddened with any bad news. Even If I would tell them immediately, they would still not make it during my operation. It was so urgent that I had to be operated three hours after I was diagnosed of acute appendicitis. If I told my parents, they had to travel at least 8 hours by bus. I only told my sister the day after the operation and asked her to keep it until my discharge from the hospital. My parents only knew it during the last day of my stay in the hospital. It was also my birthday. They were shocked but relieved after I convinced them I was in good condition already. A family in my church offered me to stay in their house for about 10 days. I am always grateful to the Mawas family for that. Ate Jing (RN) nursed me for free. Vienna (a very good friend of mine) shared her room to me. Man-man (Ate Jing and Kuya Ben's son) was my playful companion.

I also thank God for helping me hurdle the rigor of my career and my studies. I thought I could not finish my masteral on time with all the demands of my previous job. I almost lost hope and wanted to join few classmates who opted to drop the Strategic Plan subject. Yet, thanks to few masteral friends (special mention to Amie, Rodj, Nahlu and Lourdes) for their company and encouragement. We shared some coffee and sleepless Friday nights doing our individual strategic plan paper. And we all made it to graduation.

In addition, I thank God for the new job I have now. I got the job just in time my heart and my mind wanted it badly. I am still adjusting with the new working environment, yet, I am enjoying my new friends, new experience and new learning.

I also thank the Lord for my first two nephews. My older sister gave birth through normal delivery just few minutes after the doctor declared she had to undergo cesarian operation. Likewise, my sister-in-law did not have any problem with her delivery.

I thank God each day of my life. I thank God for loved ones who always inspire me to do best. I often miss them but I think they miss me more, with their widest smiles those few treasured moments we shared every time I got the chance to go home for a vacation.

I may get sad (well, a normal thing for human beings!) but I have learned to see and get excited of what God has prepared ahead of me.

I want to end this with my favorite Bible passage in Jeremiah 29:11- The Lord said, " For I know the plans I have for you; plan to prosper you and not to harm you; plan to give you the future you hope for."