My Favorite Mistakes

"I'm addicted to you; you're a hard habit to break..."

This line of Chicago's song entitled Hard Habit to Break has made me think of my few hard habits to break, which I prefer to call, my favorite mistakes.

I am a night person. Yes, I do plan to sleep early and wake up early but I rarely do. I wont get sleepy until the clock hits 12MN (like a Cinderella, huh!). Each morning, I hardly drag myself out of bed. The alarm clock works for me but I just like re-setting it. The good thing though is that I make it on time for work. I was only tardy twice, when I accidentally brushed my leg to a hot flat iron and when I failed to notice my cellphone clock was reset. However, most of the time I go to work with empty stomach. I am fully aware that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. I have heard about it many times from medical people and read it in many health-related articles. Unfortunately, it remains a head knowledge for me, no application yet. And each time hunger pangs and sleepiness attack, I am regretful. And again, I tell myself to sleep early and wake up early, only to do the opposite the next day.

I am a couch potato. I wont mind being in the house the whole day just watching movies, reading books, surfing the internet, writing in my blog, while eating cookies and chips. I like sports but I need someone to bring me along to the basketball court or the bowling station. I also like to go to the gym but not yet pressured to do so looking at my relatively slim figure (though I think recently I have gained weight and "fats"). Two months ago, I played bowling with my church care group but it has been two years since the last time I played basketball. My sporty momentum was lost with my extreme busyness the past two years. Nevertheless, I want to have regular sports and exercise to keep my body fit and healthy. Maybe, I'll start next week? (Here I go again! Same familiar line.)

I am a hopeless romantic. I do not easily fall in love but when I do I love until it hurts. In my past relationship, I gave a second chance, amidst oppositions of my family and my friends, only to be doubly hurt on the second betrayal. A part of me did regret, but I learned one important thing--that choosing the one for me is really hard without God leading my heart. Since then, I entrust to God my future lifetime partner.

Yes, I wrestle with my heart--to stop being a hopeless romantic and be more in touch with reality. I do tell my heart to love the one who loves me, not necessarily the one I love. After all, love can be learned. But my heart is not convinced so far. The statement of Blaise Pascal, "The heart has its own reasons that reason cannot understand", seems to justify my stubborn heart. I believe that the love I deserve will just come. I do not have to settle for the second best. God's best is worth waiting for. Now, I want to call myself a "hopeful romantic".

My favorite mistakes. They make me sick and cry once in a while. Yet, they are just hard to break. . .